In Part 2 of this blog is the mental & emotional consequences of your words. Do you have ADHD? Are you depressed? Anxious? Overweight? Addicted? If your words define you, what are you saying out loud or in your head about yourself?
When something goes wrong, how critical is the voice in your head? Do you call yourself names (“I’m so stupid; I’m so lame; I can’t believe I did that / forgot that AGAIN; I’m NEVER going to be smart enough; I’m ALWAYS screwing up…”)
When the voice in your head is loud, what is it saying?
On good days, in good moments, are you giving yourself compliments? Praising yourself for doing a great job? Celebrating with a little “woo-hoo!” when you reach a goal?
The truth is, we all thrive with praise and we wither with criticism. And our brains have weird wiring .. criticism permeates deeper and lasts far longer than praise does. So words that you heard in childhood can still be echoing in your memory. The good news is, your brain can be rewired, and your brain will respond to new words you install and repeat.
Remember this: your mind responds to the pictures and words you install, and whatever you focus on, you get more of. Your mind works powerfully with repetition, and in order to replace the negative words or harsh criticisms, you need to upgrade your words and self-talk on an ongoing basis.
In order to make this work, some of us need to begin by setting the bar lower. Instead of expecting a perfect day, we need to celebrate the little victories and build on them.
I had something healthy for breakfast - not just coffee.
Everyone in my house has clean clothes on, even if the rest of the laundry isn’t folded.
I had the tough conversation instead of dreading and avoiding it.
I did a 10-minute workout.
I watched one episode of my favorite Netflix show while on the treadmill.
I tackled the hardest thing on my to-do list first.
I delegated something.
I built breaks in my schedule instead of burning out and getting cranky.
Any of these “little wins” can be acknowledged and celebrated as part of a good day. Our lives are made of these ordinary days with ordinary events. We can look at the tasks and details of our days with annoyance, because it’s not Instagram-worthy, or we can celebrate the achievements, big and small, as part of a life full of choices.
It’s been nearly a year of pandemic and lock-down. It could feel like forever, and it could feel endless, because we don’t have or know an end-date to virtual school, working from home, mask-wearing and social-distancing. We’re weary and bored and frustrated.
And yet … it’s also almost spring. There are signs of hope and change.
So here’s my challenge to you: choose some different and new words, and deliberately use them in the next hours, days, and weeks. Use them for YOUR mental health. Make a game of using new words and phrases that rewire your mind and your attitude. Pick fancy $10 words, and fling them around in conversation. See if you can get other people to start using “your” words, because you repeat them so often that they rub off on the people in your world.
Need inspiration? When someone asks how you’re doing, start with:
Energetic
Ecstatic
Dynamic
Bubbly
Unshakeable
Invigorated
Happy
Phenomenal
Sensational
Confident
Glorious
Vivacious
Wonderful
Enthusiastic
Enchanted
Irrepressibly happy
Outstanding
Fantastic
Stellar
Stupendous
Amazing
Delightful
Boundless
Terrific
Superb
Splendid
Remarkable
Sassy
Fabulous
Sparkling
Magnificent
Extraordinary
Joyful
Empowered
Smashing (bonus points if you say this with a British accent!)
Smile! Have fun with this! Remember that you’re not here to suffer through life but to live a life of extraordinary potential.
And please, please, please swap out “I just can’t TAKE THIS ANYMORE!” with
“I have phenomenal coping skills.”
Because you do. You are a resilient, remarkable human being with one life to celebrate. Let your gifts and talents shine ...there’s only one you!
If you’re interested in learning more about your mind-and-body connection, please click here to get on the waitlist for my upcoming course, Embodied. Embodied is all about celebrating and owning the power of your brain, nervous system and body to control your anxiety, stress and overwhelming emotions.
Angela Hall
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